The Last Dinner
07-30-2002, 10:28 p.m.

The Last Dinner...

July 30, 2002

Tonight was the last time that Chuck will ever eat the way he has always eaten. I teased him, that it was his last dinner, and in many ways, I guess it is a good description.

For as long as I've known Chuck, he has been a big eater, and let's face it for a long time before that as well. He weighs in at 400 lbs, but he has a heart that is as big. I always loved making dinner and having him over as a guest because he always made you feel like he loved what you made and that he appreciated your food.. and we would chuckle at how much food he could eat...it was just Chuck. Tomorrow he starts his liquid diet, in preparation of his gastric bypass surgery on Thursday. They say that if he doesn't lose the weight, he won't live a long life, and maybe that is true.. but this just seems so final, so extreme.

All the way to their house for dinner, Stephen and I talked about food, what our favorite foods are, and if we knew that we were dying, and had one meal left.. what would it be. I so cannot even imagine doing what Chuck is doing. For the rest of his life, he will eat meals that are small.. no more than 3 ounces at a time for a long time... eventually, maybe up to 5 or 6 ounces. That will be all his stomach will hold. Not to mention that there will be foods that he will not be able to tolerate at all.

He will lose weight, and he will lose it quickly, and he will keep it off, but at what cost. I respect what he is doing, and he has my full support.. but I will gladly take my hard hours at the gym, and my even harder control on my own eating. I will relish the times that I cheat, and not the hours I have to spend making it up, but at least I have those choices.. I can succeed or fail, and I can feel proud of that success when I do succeed (no negative thoughts here).

All my best wishes are with Chuck.. I hope that his surgery goes well and that he has a quick recovery. I hope that his lifestyle will be all that he hopes it will be and I hope that as he loses weight that he is happier with himself. I hope he lives a long healthy life and that he is there for the girls for so many years to come. I also hope that Sherry gets thru the surgery, as she is pretty scared.. and I hope that she easily learns to adjust her own lifestyle to fit with his.. this is a change for her and the girls as well. This is a big thing for all of them.. and I hope that I can be there to help and support along the way, as much as I might not understand it. I mean, don't get me wrong, I do understand it.. and I would feel more secure about it if I knew that Chuck had tried to lose weight in other ways.. diets and exercise.. but he hasn't.. he just assumes that he can't do it, and that this in the answer.... maybe it is for him, how do I know. I am happy if he is.. that is all that counts.

Daily Tidbits

1. Sherry made a great dinner, which was totally fattening, and which I did totally love. Of course I went for a walk when I got home.. 2 bad meals 2 nights in a row... eek. At least I had good workouts today, lol.
2. Jen is home.. yay!!! I was so happy to talk to her today and I missed her bunches. I am going to take the girls and go see her tomorrow night. I can't wait, I am so excited.
3. I went to Land's End today to get some new pants. Thanks Tricia, for letting me know about their 5.00 sale.. I grabbed a few to try on, and the 18s were a little loose, woo hoo... so I went back and got 16's. I got a pair of Khaki's and a pair of jeans, and the khaki's are a tiny bit tight, but the jeans fit great. I just love wearing a 16... woo hoo.
4. We brought the girls home and they are staying for a week, yay. I am having fun with them, and June is having so much fun playing with the cats.. she loves animals so much, especially cats.. it's going to be a long week for them, snicker.