Friendships
08-08-2002, 3:11 p.m.

Friendships...

August 08, 2002

One thing that I really love about my friendships, is the ability that we have to talk things thru. We might not always see things the same way, but we do always take the time to at least try to understand each other, even in the times that we disagree. Friendship is not always an easy thing, you run into problems left and right, but in the end, it all balances out and I think that you are left with way more than you would have had any other way.

I have things in my life that I need to work on. Sometimes I think I expect too much of people.. and I expect people to be too much like me, and that just isn't the way that life is. I think that in my better-me quest, this is something that I need to find a way to resolve. It certainly would cause a lot less stress in my life if I were to figure it out. I need to learn how to balance my feelings, and my needs. I really need to learn to allow people to be who they are, even when it doesn't match who I am.. the one thing I already do know, is how to talk things out. Not everyone likes this about me at all times though.. my need to talk thru everything, because let's face it, it's not always fun or even necessary to talk thru everything, but I can't change who I am, and talking helps me so very much. Luckily, my friends humor me with this, occasionally.

Another thing is old friendships... where do they go? Why is it that sometimes when things go bad you can figure it out and work it out, but other times you just let it die? Does it mean that the friendship was less strong, or unable to handle the stress? I don't think so. I have alot of lost friendships, and for some reason I have been thinking about them lately.. friends from high school, friends over the past few years, and while they didn't end badly.. they just sorta drifted away. I have done my part is letting them die, and now I wonder why.

I have been talking to an old friend that I used to talk with alot before we had a pretty big misunderstanding. She said something to me the other day, that really got me thinking. I am not going to go into it here, because it isn't necessary, it was a good thing and I just want you to know Kim, I am glad that we are talking again. I know that it wasn't always easy or good, but at least it's a start.

Another friend that I only know online at this point, Amy, is coming to Chicago for a visit. This makes me very happy and I feel like I already know her so well that it will be like meeting an old friend when I finally get together with her. We are trying to decide what we are going to do when she is here, and I can't wait to figure it all out. I have a few ideas, but I know that whatever comes together in the end, it will be a nice time, and that I will walk away from it all knowing that I have another friendship that will last. I so cannot wait to meet you Amy.

Next week, Tricia, Jess, Cory and I are going to go to a scrapbook class. I am really looking forward to it (now if only we could get Jen involved in scrappin, so she could take some classes with us), and I have really been enjoying spending more time with both Jess and Tricia. The funny thing, I always thought that Jess didn't like me, and so I didn't take the time to get to know her as well as I could of..what is so funny about that? Well, she told me that she thought I didn't like her. Gee, that was time wasted. Sometimes I wonder how come I don't have more friends than I do.. and it's because I don't take the time to cultivate them... that is something else I am trying to change, and so far, I am pretty happy with the effort... Now to just learn that all my friends do not have to be friends with each other, lol. That might even be a good thing.

Daily Tidbits

1. I took Chrissy and June home yesterday. I miss them! June was cute.. cause Stephen said that the minute they got into the car to leave (they hadn't even left the drive-way yet) June asked, when are we coming back. She so didn't want to leave.
2. Tonight is dinner at Stephen's parents. I haven't been there in a few weeks, so I am really looking forward to it, and to hearing the family gossip that I am so far behind on.
3. I haven't been to see Kathleen lately either. I really haven't done much of anything where Stephen's family is concerned lately. I called there last night, and I am going to go over tomorrow night. I am looking forward to that very very much.
4. I didn't even get started on putting my room together yet.. .LOL.. it might get done someday... uh huh, I believe that.